Meditations

What is maturity?

This realisation that you were born innocent, like a flower, presented by gods to your human parents. And the realisation that you have, by your own actions, or through the machinations of the society, sullied the flower all these years. Maturity is removing the dirt from the flower so that when you return to your source, your God, you be clean again, or at least try to return to the original clean state as much as possible. 

That point of understanding is maturity. Life after attaining maturity is meaningful living. 

And that understanding revealed itself to me only now, after becoming a father, after seeing my daughter. She is my spiritual guru i was in search for so long. 

The rest of my life will be a long struggle to return to my original clean state before i return to my God, my source.

I now have a fair idea how God’s flower looks like. 

My flower is trying to snatch this pen so that I may focus fully on her. 

I must obey my Guru’s command. 

12.45 am, 20 September 2015. 

Happy Birthday!

Why God make people get into a relationship?

To learn something

Learn what?

Hurt

Why hurt?

Just so that you remember Him

But why do we need to remember him?

Because he created you

Ah! You seller of holy piss … my parents created me. But relationships mean forgetting your past, your parents, your old family, your brother, your sister, the friends you loved more than your life, your old memories and anybody associated with it … If I have to forget all those, why the fuck should I remember god?

(silence)

Ummm …

Ummm  … you are immature

May be. Show me the light then.

May be, may be you needed a new pair of glass to see the world differently. I am not saying what you witnessed so far was wrong, just that it adds more perspective …

But why? Why? Why? Why do I need more perspective? I was happy as I was. I am not happy with my new perspective. I am dying, I am choking, take it back. My eyes are burning. I don’t want to see, I don’t want to change anything. Bring back my old self, bring back my loved ones, bring back my life, bring back my freedom, my self-respect, my confidence, my carefree days, my politically incorrect days, my joy … oh my joy …

Joy of ignorance?

Yes, joy of ignorance if you so fancy.

Let me wash you clean ... so much of grime and blood on you ... breathe breathe breathe ... cry cry cry ... you won't? let me smack your tiny arse .... Here! Now Now! You have arrived!! Welcome, welcome!!! Happy Birthday!